Frankie heads to the Stockyard

Mel's foodie friend Frankie headed over to Hale's Stockyard, and by all accounts, it's one to try!

If you’re looking for a restaurant guaranteed to make you go up a dress size, this is the place for you.

Now I’m not saying the menu is super calorific (Friday night calories don’t count right?) – no no, the reason for your inevitable downfall into a food coma will be due to the fact you will want to try EVERYTHING on the menu, or at the very least the entire left hand side.

I visited this gloriously rustic eatery on a Friday evening in the buzzing and slightly pretentious village of Hale; the place people flock to be seen and the gossip of Cheshire’s elite is eaten up as deliciously as one of Stockyards Mac and Cheese balls.

I arrived with fellow foodie and gal pal as we were excitedly shown to our seats by the friendly and chirpy host. We perused the menus, pretending we hadn’t been agonising over the online menu all week before deciding on our beverages.

As self-proclaimed milkshake connoisseurs we were both extremely excited at the prospect of ordering the “Chocoholic”, a diabetic concoction entwining Nutella with Kinder Bueno in a splendid harmony, finished with lashings of whipped cream and a snap of the Bueno.



I took a sip and could barely contain my loudly expressed appreciation for this godly nectar. A luscious chocolate and hazelnut liquid sent me rocketing straight into a sugary cocktail heaven. The perfect balance of nutella to ice cream making the base of the shake was enough to prevent the tipple from becoming too sickly, and allowed all senses to enjoy the marvellous concoction which can only be quite rightly described as a liquidised Kinder Bueno bar, AKA Bloody marvellous.

Very satisfied with our milkshake choices, we set on deciding which main course was going to grace our lips as we agonized between burgers and hot dogs, ribs and sides – so many possibilities we had already begun deciding what we would order on our next visit.

Finally making a decision, we enthusiastically placed our orders of the Italian Stallion and the Beefy with fries and a side of mac and cheese to share.

“Would you like to substitute your fries for the mac and cheese?” The server asked.

“Don’t be absurd.” I replied.

Our mains arrived in good time by one of the lovely Stockyard servers; something I would like to divulge in further – every single one of the staff in that place were just wonderful. Funny, friendly – it was the kind of team you looked around at and thought; “Yep, I’d like to be friends with every one of you.” Although I would have to keep the girl who joked she would pinch some of my fries at arm’s length. (Kidding, she was lovely, but seriously don’t take my food.)



I stared at my order, taking in its beauty. A scrumptiously glistening brioche bun stuffed to the brim with hand rolled juicy meatballs, smothered in an ever so slightly spicy Italian salsa and topped with melted molten lava-esque cheese. Surrounding this work of art were the fries – nothing too major here, just your standard delicious fries adding a welcomed burst of salty goodness in between mammoth bites of dog.

My co-diner’s order arrived with the same gusto and breath-taking appearance as mine. A giant frankfurter sausage, encased within a classic hot dog bun and loaded with classic beef chilli, sliced jalapenos and again topped off with that glorious melted cheddar.

Our side order of mac and cheese was a very welcome added texture to our dinner with gooey and cheddary macaroni shells filling a decent dropped-bowl style dish. With a slight crispy top, this was the perfect combination of smooth, velvety pasta with the odd unexpected crunch which was devoured harmoniously with both main plates.

Having both successfully eaten a strong 87% of our meals, we threw in the napkins to silently reassess life.

“Would you care to look at the dessert menu?” asked the grinning server, holding two smaller clipboards to her chest.

“Is she insane?” My brain said, “You have just consumed the calorie count of a Rhino, you DO NOT need anything else. You’re already too full, just look at you, you’re out of breath just trying to focus your eyes!”

And so, my mouth said; “Sure! Why not?”

We ordered the Cookie Pizza and Ice cream to share.



A whole 7 inches of baked cookie dough arrived on our table in a takeaway pizza box. A snowball of vanilla ice cream occupying the middle, surround by melted marshmallows and miniature m&m’s.

My inner 8 year old and I were delirious with excitement. Undoing yet another button on my jeans, I picked up a spoon and began to dig in.
Sweet explosions of hot cookie dough infused with the shells of melted m&m’s delighted my taste buds as the ice creams and melted mallows offered a cool, creamy relief against the sharp sweet taste of chocolate chips.

Unable to eat more than half, we both lowered our spoons, and allowed ourselves to begin descending into our post-eating daze; where we reflect on the wonders of which we’ve eaten whilst simultaneously wondering how on earth we would stand up.

As we divided the bill, we were both satisfied that the cost of feeling as delightfully stuffed as we did was reflected in the price shown on our receipts. It was a price you would be happy to spend on a Friday as a; “well done, you survived the week!” Treat, but perhaps a little more than you would like to pay on a casual Wednesday should you choose to splurge mid-week; but hey, this is Hale! What can you expect?

Overall I was positively pleased with my experience dining at Stockyard. Any place which combines friendly, genuine service with an inability to control portion size is definitely an eatery I would dine at time and time again.

My only tip? Just don’t plan on moving much for the next 2 days.

Follow Frankie on Twitter @FrankAboutFoods!

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Posted: Friday 13th November 2015
ID: 2171 - 1450